UK wedding etiquette guide: traditions, guest list, costs & engagement for a stress-free, personalized celebration.
Planning a wedding can be incredibly exciting, but it can also be stressful. Everyone seems to have strong opinions on what is right and wrong at weddings, and these can vary. There is no “proper” way to get married, and you should plan the occasion as you and your partner want, but it is helpful to be aware of general wedding etiquette – this can help to guide your decisions. So, what is expected in terms of general wedding etiquette in the UK?
The Engagement
First, you have the engagement. Traditionally, the groom will ask the father of the pride for permission first, but this has become a little outdated but is still expected in some families. This is why you should consider the bride’s family and whether or not this would be appropriate. If in doubt, it is better to ask just to be safe!
It is also traditional to propose with a beautiful diamond engagement ring, and you should consider what setting would be best for your partner – keep in mind that public proposals can put a tremendous amount of pressure on your partner. If you want to post on social media, you might want to tell your nearest and dearest in person first, as they will likely want to be told instead of finding out on Facebook. Many couples will have an engagement party, but this is not essential, so it is something you can discuss.
Wedding Costs
Obviously, the cost of a wedding is a key factor, with the average cost in 2024 being £20,700 (don’t worry; there are always ways to make it much more affordable!). Traditionally, the bride’s family pays for the reception, and the groom’s will pay for the marriage fees and groom’s suit, but this is not always the case and will depend on circumstances. It can be a sensitive topic, which is why open communication is important. It is not expected to pay for an open bar all evening, but many will provide drinks up until the evening reception begins.
Wedding Guests
Another challenging area of the wedding to manage is the guest list. This can be a sensitive issue, so again, open communication is key. Ultimately, it is your special day, and you should not get dragged into the “politics” of who to invite and who not to invite.
The idea of giving single guests a plus one is quite dated, so do not feel pressured to do this. It is similar with partners of guests, especially if you do not know them well! If you invite someone on the stag or hen do, it is likely that they will expect a wedding invitation. You should send out a save the date as early as possible and chase up people who do not RSVP, as you want to confirm numbers early on in the planning stage.
The above will hopefully be useful when it comes to planning your wedding. There are no strict rules in place, but knowing the etiquette can help guide your decisions and help you plan the perfect event for you and your partner.